81 Ways How to Treat Your Wife in Islam

1. Make her feel secure, don’t threaten her with divorce.
2. Give sincere Salaams.
3. Treat her gently, like a fragile vessel.
4. Advise in private, at the best time, in the best way and atmosphere.
5. Be generous with her.
6. Warm the seat for her, you will warm her heart.
7. Avoid anger, be in Wudhu at all times.
8. Look good and smell great for your wife.
9. Don’t be rigid or harsh-hearted or you will be broken.
10. Be a good listener.
11. Yes for flattery. No for arguing.
12. Call your wife with the best names, cute nicknames, and names she loves to hear.
13. A pleasant surprise.
14. Preserve and guard the tongue.
15. Expect, accept, and overlook her shortcomings.
16. Give sincere compliments.
17. Encourage her to keep good relations with her family.
18. Speak of the topic of her interest.
19. Express to her relatives, how wonderful she is.
20. Give each other gifts.
21. Get rid of routine, surprise her.
22. Have a good opinion of each other.
23. Have good manners, overlook small things, don’t nitpick.
24. Add a drop of patience, increase during pregnancy, menses.
25. Expect and respect her jealously.
26. Be humble.
27. Sacrifice your happiness for hers.
28. Help at home, with housework.
29. Help her love your relatives, but don’t try to force her.
30. Let her know that she is the ideal wife for you.
31. Remember your wife in Du’a.
32. Leave the past for Allah, don’t dwell on, dig into, or bring it up.
33. Don’t act as if you are doing her a favor by working or providing, Allah is the Provider, the husband is the carrier of the sustenance to the family.
34. Take Shaitan as your enemy, not your wife.
35. Put food in your wife’s mouth.
36. Treat your wife like she is the most precious pearl that you want to protect.
37. Show her your smile.
38. Don’t ignore the small things, deal with them before they be come big.
39. Avoid being harsh-hearted.
40. Respect and show that you appreciate her thinking.
41. Help her to find and build her inner strengths and skills.
42. Respect that she might not be in mood for intimacy, stay within Halaal boundaries.
43. Help her take care of the children.
44. Give her gifts with your tongue, be an artist with your compliments.
45. Sit down and eat meals together.
46. Let her know that you will be traveling or returning from travel, give her sufficient notice.
47. Don’t leave home in anger.
48. Maintain the secrecy and privacy of the home.
49. Encourage each other in worship.
50. Respect and fulfill her rights upon you.
51. Live with her in kindness, goodness, fairness in good and bad times.
52. Kiss your wife, foreplay, don’t jump on her like a bull.
53. Keep disputes between the two of you, don’t take it outside.
54. Show care for her health and well-being.
55. Remember you are not always right or perfect yourself.
56. Share your happiness and sadness with her.
57. Have mercy for her weaknesses.
58. Be a firm support for her to lean on.
59. Accept her as is, she is a package deal.
60. Have a good intention for her.
61. Cook a dish for her.
62. Designate a nice, clean, spacious area in your home for the two of you to pray at night whenever you can.
63. Women love flowers. Make a trail of them on the floor leading to the gift you made for her.
64. Give her a nice massage when she least expects it.
65. Send your wife a text message out of the blue with a message of love.
66. Send your wife an email without a reason.
67. Go out on a date or a get-away for the weekend in a nice location, preferably without kids.
68. Do something for your wife’s family, whether it is a gift, or a chat with her teen brother who needs mentoring, or whatever. It will get you lots of brownie points.
69. Do not keep reminding and demanding your rights all the time.
70. Shop groceries for her and call her from the store and ask her what she needs for the home, for herself or for her to give to people as gifts.
71. Ask her if she would like to invite her female friends over for ladies only get together and arrange for the dinner.
72. Ask her to send gifts to her parents and siblings.
73. Help her parents pay off debt. Send her poor relatives some money.
74. Write love notes or poems and place them in the book she’s been reading.
75. If she tells you something she had just learned from the Qur’an or Hadith, do not dismiss her or ridicule her effort, instead listen to her and take her word.
76. Plant her a kitchen garden with all kind of herbs she needs for cooking.
78. Update her PC or laptop with a new one or get her a new mobile phone.
79. Learn to do a special massage technique and surprise her with your new expertise.
80. Teach your children to respect and honor their mother.
81. Be humorous with her when she makes a mistake in the kitchen (like when she put too much salt or burnt her baking).

by Fawad J Kiyani


22 Comments on “81 Ways How to Treat Your Wife in Islam”

  1. […] di postingan yang kemarin aku share tulisan untuk para suami, maka agar seimbang, kali ini aku share juga tulisan untuk para […]

  2. mujtaba says:

    i am not agree with you, its not islamic ways to treat wife. If you are right, rewrite each point with quranic refrences to prove you are correct. Dont misguide people.

  3. naeem says:

    i believe it to be a very nice article and it will help maintaining a better and happy relationship.

  4. saira says:

    Masha’Allah. Your wife would love this so will Allah and your children

  5. Anonny says:

    This is more of a list of “How wifes would love to be treated”. Must’ve been written by a women or wife. I’m a husband and its really hard to do all of it at the same time. I’m just human and might missed some of it sometimes. Wifes should give and take also sometimes i think.

  6. imran says:

    By GOD these are most wonderfull advices

  7. Hajja Ayisha Jeffries Cisse says:

    I can’t believe we are questioning kindness. This is insane and its why the one who raises such contradictions to the “humanity of our Faith” should seek forgiveness for driving people away from the Ummat and this Way! The moral of the story is that if we wish Allah to be merciful to us, we must be eager to show mercy to all the living creatures of the earth.

    When a flower blooms, its color and scent first touch the garden near it, and then spread. In the same way, a Muslim’s acts of human kindness should first touch those nearest to him, his family and his neighbors.

    These words from the Quran and Hadith shows well how Kindness is very highly regarded in Islam.

    “Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching; and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious; for your Lord knows best who have strayed from His Path, and who are truly guided.”
    Quran 16:125

    “Do you know what is better than charity and fasting and prayer? It is keeping peace and good relations between people, as quarrels and bad feelings destroy mankind.”
    (Muslims & Bukhari)

    “Reviling (abusing) a Muslim is disobedience to God, and fighting with (killing) him is infidelity.”
    (Bukhari, Muslim)

    “Narrated Anas ibn Malik: The Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) said: Three things are the roots of faith: to refrain from (killing) a person who utters, “There is no god but Allah” and not to declare him unbeliever whatever sin he commits, and not to excommunicate him from Islam for his any action.”

    “The most excellent Jihad is that for the conquest of self.”

    “Kindness is a mark of faith, and whoever is not kind has no faith.” (Muslim)

    “Whoever is kind, Allah will be kind to him; therefore be kind to man on the earth. He who is in heaven will show mercy on you.”
    (Abu Dawud and Tirmidhi)

    “You will not enter paradise until you have faith; and you will not complete your faith till you love one another.”

    “You have two characters which God likes; gentleness and deliberation.”


  8. Abdi Ibrahim says:

    masha allah, jetha kumula for u’r biuty advice. its realy great to read sach prety knowledg, may allah increas it for u.

  9. Imran says:

    MR.Fawad J Kiyani, Jasakallahu hairan,good effort.

  10. This is really fruitful advice that Muslim husbands can learn and apply to their marriage life.

  11. Mohamed Hajji says:

    Asalam Aleikum.May Allah give u the reward of this beautiful article.I don’t see this misguidance and you dont need to have Quran and Hadith proofs.

  12. Mohsin says:

    Indeed this is an awesome, realistic and most desired list for women.
    Please share one for husbands also. Good Work !!

  13. Abdjalaal says:

    Jazakumullahu khayran

  14. Alfred manokwane says:

    Thanks for your kind words appreciate them I always loved islamic guidance and reference/referals to the Quran ,according to me all life leaved based on the teachings of it its a beautiful life …….thanks again Brothers and sisters

  15. Jazaak Allah Khairan

  16. Maratha salim says:

    I never knew Islam teaches all those and my husband makes me feel like he is doing me a favor by marrying me. Thank you for the guidance I cry to sleep every night I hope he change

  17. Mehbuba says:

    Fantastic.All the points are wonderful.

  18. Mehbuba says:

    Simply fantastic.

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